Thursday, January 22, 2009
How much I Don't know
I was thinking today- that as a Mom, I know NOTHING! I used to think that I knew it all, I think I was a pretty cocky new mom.. Just that I thought I had it all figured out. I meet these Mom's with Teenagers, or college age kids and I wonder if they look at me and think, "Oh, you just wait..." or "think you are tired now?" I love the moms who just smile at me and tell me to try to enjoy it, without offering any other advice, or how much worst it gets. I have a friend of sorts at gymnastics with 2 kids, her oldest is 3, and she is ALWAYS horrified at my parenting.. This week was because Liam was walking around barefoot and his feet were all dirty..or I let him eat that fruit snack he dropped... She was "surprised" that Rowan wasn't potty trained (at age 2 yrs 1 month) since her daughter was trained by age 1.... etc... and so without going into a lot of my thoughts while I am there- It makes me wonder if that is how more experienced mothers view me.. You know, a little unrealistic? I feel like I owe them an apology because one thing is for sure, the older I get, and the more I know, the more I realize how much I DON'T KNOW. And I am willing to listen to any good, realistic, do-able advice.
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4 comments:
The older my kids get, the more I have to come to terms that I have no idea what I am doing. I think we have instincts when they are babies and we try and do what is best, but as they get older and face things that we can't hold their hands thru, or they face challenges that I didn't at that age, I think I am clueless as to how to parent them. I guess that is where prayer and faith comes in. That what we are teaching them will keep them safe and the little stuff (dirty feet and fruit snacks off the ground) don't really matter so much.
The more parents I meet with kids in every phase of life is this: to each his own. There are all sorts of parents...and you end up with all sorts of kids regardless of how their parents did or did not stress themselves out trying to make their lives perfect. I think you do awesome with your kids...truthfully I wish many a day that I could relax a little more like you do! None of us know what in the heck we are doing - I don't care how old your kids are (1 or 35.) You just tell that mom at the gym that you would like to talk to her in 15 years when her child has an anxiety disorder because of the tremendous amount of pressure they are under to be "perfect."
Some women are F-ind retarded and my experience is that - If you judge other's parenting and make comments- you always eat humble pie sooner or later. But seriously. my kids always wear shoes and never eat dirty snacks- just chalk and shaving cream.
Yup. Humble pie. Sooner or later. It's the truth.
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